Goodbye Sad Poems, But Funny

Goodbye Sad Poems is a popular search, particularly for co-workers who are departing for pastures new, or retiring. I have written many such poems where the goodbye maybe sad but the poem is funny. These were written about very specific people but here I've taken all the generic material and welded it together to produce a poem to apply to anyone...with a sense of humour. If to a teetotaller, take out the verses about drink. It is intended to be read out loud by two people, the black type is good cop and the purple is bad cop

Today)(tonight), we have a change of style

It's a different kind of do

I've cut my eloquent, articulate, smooth and polished speech

That'll save an hour or two

We have for you a little dittyA farewell and good luck quipTo say goodbye to our dear friendAs he departs this sinking ship

Yes a Co-worker is leavingIt's now sincerity timeTo pay him a special tributeBy insulting him in rhyme

Co-workers leaving is always sadA time for sorrow and grievingBut today we can be happyCoz it's Charlie Smith that's leaving

I've heard about your dittiesI'm not sure I'm very keenI just take poetic licenseYou take liberties, you mean

If you're going to insult my friendI don't want any partOh (Mary)(Bill), don't make a fussI'll behave, cross my heart

OK, but no derogatory remarks

Did I not promise just nowNo innuendoes or calling him namesGet on, yer silly cow

Alright, it's goodbye to a hard worker

It is a terrible pity

To lose such a staunch member of...

The Skivers and Shirkers Committee

We're saying goodbye to a learned colleagueWho knows that one over the eight is nineWe're bidding adieu to a man of spiritWho's very fond of wine

We all like to socialiseWith a drop of wine or beerBut to us, it's just a pastimeTo Charlie, it's his career

Work is a mere distractionAs a respite, it's fineBetween yesterday's binge on beerAnd today's excess of wine

Charlie's a very hard workerDo you really think that's true?If you tell Mr (Brown) Charlie's leavingHe'll say "Sorry, Charlie Who?

No I'm not having itWe can't treat a friend this wayOK, Clever ClogsYou think of something nice to say

You can always rely on CharlieWhen you're in a desperate needWhen things are bad but could get worseThey will, that's guaranteed

I remember when poor Charlie (lost that big order)(fell down the stairs) (whatever)I felt sorry for him, more than a bitIt's something Charlie would like to forgetYes, that's why I mentioned it

You couldn't have been more insulting

What have you got to say?

I'm very sorry...I'm very sorry

You made me throw all the best bits away

Charlie, take no notice of himAt least I'm on your sideThis one here, couldn't have been more insultingBut believe me, Charlie, I tried

I'd like now to propose a toast

To bring this to an end

To Charlie, no longer a co-worker

But still a very dear friend

Jon Bratton 2009but based on his earlier material

If you want more Goodbye Sad Poems...but funny, click the link

Goodbye Sad poems, but funny

This 'Goodbye Sad Poems, but funny' blog entry is copyright Jon Bratton 2009. The poem may be used for non commercial purposes

St Georges Day

Today is not only St Georges Day but...Today is St George's and the Bard's Birth and Death dayHave the happiest of daysJust pondering...if he was born and died on the same dayHow come he wrote so many flippin’ playsJon Bratton © 2007This next one was written for a specific person…the name has been changedGOLFER / BIRTHDAY ON ST GEORGE'S DAY / EXOTIC HOLIDAYSJames Drummond Justice BrownYou've reached the big Five 0And still in shape, despite suppin aleAt 80 shillings a go ....You occasionally spoil a good walkKnocking a ball o'er dales and hillsAnd as a Tory with Healey eyebrowsYou really need your acting skillsFor Holidays you avoid the madding crowdFrom Costa del Sol you'd run a milePreferring instead the Orient ExpressOr an exotic Western IsleYou're a Noel Coward kind of chapThat's clear from the life you forgeAnd as a Taurus you share the destinyOf the Bard and bold St GeorgeExcept you're not so much a writerMore a talker, it must be saidand you've never slain a dragon.... you married her instead!This was written for a competition. It didn’t win because after I had written it, I realised that the competition had been held the year previousT'was just after Easter, I was wearing me bonnetI sat down to write this Shakespearean sonnetAs an Imperial I ne'er shout of centimetresIambically speaking, know nowt of pentametersThis sonnet's to celebrate St George's DayA rare opportunity for me to sayIt's ironic, nay verily, more idioticThat a Palestinian Turk makes me feel patrioticAt the next World Cup, may England prevailAt the Plymouth Arms, may this win me free aleJon Bratton © 2007This is one of a series of silly ditties I wrote for the webpage you can reach by following the link belowPoem For Susan GeorgeIt's 23rd AprilThis card is sent to sayTo the hard of hearing and dyslexicsToday's your special dayJon Bratton © 2007Click the LinkFor moreSt Georges Day Poems

Was Shakespeare Gay or Bisexual

Was Shakespeare Gay or Bisexual?

Look at the earlier portrait of Will and look at this newly discovered one.

Spot the difference?For all purposes and intentsIn the one he's a serious poet and dramatistIn the other, as camp as a row of tents

"In the early sonnets, Shakespeare writes about his great love, who happens to be a young man. While many people assume this to mean that he had a male lover and thus was either gay or bisexual there are others who still believe that his male friend was not his lover but someone who was simply very close to him emotionally "...to read more, click the link

Was Shakespeare Gay or Bisexual