Sexy Text Messages a313-a315

a313: On wedding night, newly weds had horny sex for whole night. Next morning;
Husband asked :How was it honey, did u like it?
Wife burst in anger : You put your d*ck in my Nose’ Hole.......
Husband : Why didn’t you told me?
Wife : because nuts was in my mouth.
- Vishal Sharma.

a314: A nurse was preparing the body of a handsome young man for his autopsy when she noticed he had died with a huge erection. She did the best she could to work around it but found herself becoming aroused by his huge erect cock.

After much thought she slid off her underwear and mounted the corpse and rode his erected penis. She was getting really hot and into it and began moaning loudly. This caught the attention of the head nurse. She walked into the room and to her horror found her subordinate having sex with the corpse.

"What the hell are you doing?" she exclaimed

The nurse jumped off the body quickly and stammered.

"I was taking advantage of the situation. You should try it yourself."

The head nurse flustered blurted out.

"I couldn't do that, it’s immoral."

"Come on try it."

"Really I couldn't. Besides, I’m having my period."

"I wont tell if you wont."

After a moment she smiles and mounts the man’s hard member and starts riding. As she reaches climax the man’s eyes pop open and he gasps for breath. The head nurse jumps off scared out of her mind.

"I... I thought you were dead." She proclaims.

The man smiles and replies, I was but i needed a blood transfusion... Thanks."
- Darcsyde.

a315: One day there was a poor little girl. Her mother didn’t have any money to buy her underwear. One day the little girl was wearing a little dress and playing up in a tree. A priest walked by and looked up, concerned he called the little girl down and said: "Little girl take this $100 and go buy you some new underwear and a pretty dress."
The little girl ran home and told her mother what happened.
Seizing the opportunity, the next day the mother was up in the tree without any underwear.
The priest walked by and called her down and said:
"Here’s $2 go and buy yourself some razors!"
- id10T.