Sexy Text Messages a340-a342

a340: 3 truck drivers died and met St. Peters at the Pearly Gates.
There was a JB Hunt, a Wal Mart, and an ole bull hauler truck driver.
St. Peters said, "I’m going to ask you 2 questions, I want you to answer them honestly."
He asked the JB Hunt and Wal Mart driver, "Have you ever cheated on your log books?"
They replied, "No sir."
St. Peters asks, "You ever cheated on your wife?"
They replied, " No we sure haven't."
St. Peters says, "You 2 go to door #1."
The ole bull hauler walks up there and St. Peters asks, "Have you ever cheated on your log book?"
The ole bull hauler replies, "Fuck yes I have, drove from New York to L.A. and never wrote down an hour either way."
St. Peters asks, "You ever cheated on your wife?"
The ole bull hauler replies, "Oh hell yes, there’s this bitch in New Mexico that gives the best blow job in the world!"
St. Peters tells him, "You go to door #2."
The ole bull hauler strolls over and looks back at St. Peters, "Why am I going to door #2 and those 2 assholes are going to door #1?"
St. Peters replies, "Cause those 2 are going to hell for lying and you and I are going to New Mexico!"
- Corey Dunkin.

a341: A penis said to the balls, "Get ready. We’re going to a party."
"You f*cking liar," the balls said. "You always get in and leave us outside."
- Derek.

a342: There were two babies inside their mothers womb. Baby number one asks
baby number two."what do you want to be when you grow up?" Baby
number two says, " I want to be a plumber" Baby number one asks baby
number two, "why do you want to be a plumber?" Baby number two replies" I
want to get out of here sometime, and I will need to know how to get all of
this water out" Baby number two asks baby number one," what do you want
to be when you grow up?" Baby number one replies, " I want to be a fighter"
Baby number two asks," why do you want to be a fighter?" Baby number one
replies, " Because, Next time that bald guy sticks his head in hear I'm going to
kick his ass!"
- Jacob Jordan.