Leaving Poem

Anyway, he decided to join a choirHe'd heard singers could be funAnd besides, if he could get a SingerHe'd get more sewing done.(..of wild oats)

This is one of a number of saying goodbye/leaving job poems I wrote and read out at leaving parties for British and American expats, leaving after a number of years working in a Middle Eastern country. In this particular one, for a horticulturist and his wife I had a second person reading the insulting lines...shown in bold

Horticulturist grows and grows

This is just a little dittyA ma-salama poemTo say goodye to our dear friendsAs they make their way back home

Yes folks here we go againIt's goodbye ditty timeWe usually do this kind of thingWith insults all in rhyme

But these two people are too niceFor anything like thatSo I'm striking out this next lineDick Salisbury's getting fat?

Well, come on, let's face itHe's not exactly underweight

He's just maximising growth potentialIt's his job to propagate

Well, I must say he's good at itThe evidence clearly showsHe must be eating bone mealHe just grows,,,and grows...and grows

He's like one of his tomatoesFed on growing stuffDick, it's time to ease off a bitYou've grown quite big enough

Now look we've discussed thisYou're just being rudeI'm just trying to make the pointThat Dick is fond of food

So what if Dick's a little..podgey? fuller figuredWho wants him slim and slick?

Exactly, let's ask the ladiesWho likes a big fat Dick?

There's 68 more verses to come so I'll leave it there for today but stay tuned for the more to come...who was Wanda?